My last blog was written many months ago. Was it about my brother's passing? What has happened that I didn't write for so long? Am not sure. Maybe it was just the routine, going to work , coming home late, dinner and then feeling sleepy after dinner, playing with the phone or kpopping or korean movies, all the home makeover programmes on astro.... then I question what have I done with my time? All I remember starting Ramadan in June/July, then Eid and then I had to attend a course for one month in August, two weeks of assignment and that brought me to mid September already. Two weeks at work till early Oct. Then 12 days off on a much needed holiday. Since then back at work with more on the plate.
Admidst all that I did not go to my other house for more than 6 months and when I did go in Oct after I came back from my holidays, I felt like collapsing and crying cause the lawn was with lallang and weeds up to the knees.
At the same time my mind was so cluttered with many problems, I couldn't discuss with anyone and I guess the presence of my daughter, son-in-law and grandson, Jundi was so comforting as they make an effort to visit the Subang house. They even stayed for two weeks, once, and another time about a week. Felt so blessed with their presence. I see them more than I see my son who is living with me. He is like me, like his brother, a confirmed workaholic. Hubby has other responsibilities, so sometimes he's home sometimes he's not.
Nevertheless despite everything that happens, I am not overly concern about making a checklist on doing house chores but I always have a checklist on things to do to maintain silaturrahim and that stresses me up when I cannot achieve to improve silaturrahim with some people. Having a big family is not easy. The weekends are basically for that and the endless wedding invitations. I sometimes, under my breath, wishing that the Malays keep weddings within the family. Seriously... traditions ajak sekampung which can be quite a toll on the pocket.
My sister and hubby always tell me not to analyse about things too much. Right now I still do analyse things cause it's related to people. If I don't think about it anymore that means I really do not care and that's bad. So don't let me get to that stage. That would be disastrous in a relationship. May Allah help me find a way. Amin.
Admidst all that I did not go to my other house for more than 6 months and when I did go in Oct after I came back from my holidays, I felt like collapsing and crying cause the lawn was with lallang and weeds up to the knees.
At the same time my mind was so cluttered with many problems, I couldn't discuss with anyone and I guess the presence of my daughter, son-in-law and grandson, Jundi was so comforting as they make an effort to visit the Subang house. They even stayed for two weeks, once, and another time about a week. Felt so blessed with their presence. I see them more than I see my son who is living with me. He is like me, like his brother, a confirmed workaholic. Hubby has other responsibilities, so sometimes he's home sometimes he's not.
Nevertheless despite everything that happens, I am not overly concern about making a checklist on doing house chores but I always have a checklist on things to do to maintain silaturrahim and that stresses me up when I cannot achieve to improve silaturrahim with some people. Having a big family is not easy. The weekends are basically for that and the endless wedding invitations. I sometimes, under my breath, wishing that the Malays keep weddings within the family. Seriously... traditions ajak sekampung which can be quite a toll on the pocket.
My sister and hubby always tell me not to analyse about things too much. Right now I still do analyse things cause it's related to people. If I don't think about it anymore that means I really do not care and that's bad. So don't let me get to that stage. That would be disastrous in a relationship. May Allah help me find a way. Amin.
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