Early this morning the topic for the morning tazkirah is on loving your wife. Ustaz Syed Nor Hisyam..... (will get his correct name and fill it in after) started by saying that the best gift you (fathers) can give your child is to teach him/her how to love their mother, i.e. your wife.
During the days of Saidina Omar Al-Khatab r.a. (apologies if I do not write this well), a guy was on the way to see Saidina Omar when he heard Saidina Omar's wife babbling away (berleter in the Malay language, is there an English word describing that?)as he was approaching the house. He did not continue to walk to Saidina Omar's house but instead turn around and left but was quickly called back by Saidina Omar. He was asked why he turned back but he refused to explain why but on Saidina Omar's insistence he explained. He said that he had a problem and wanted to ask Saidina Omar's opinion on it but as he was approaching the house he heard Saidina Omar's wife babbling away over only God knows what thus making him turn to leave. So Saidina Omar ra. insisted what his problem was so he explained. He actually wanted to ask Saidina Omar what he should do because his wife loves to do the same ( babbling away or berleter).
Saidina Omar responded to let her be after all she is the one person who beareth our child, she takes care of our children, she takes care of the food that she served us ...... (Do look up the correct references ok). Just let her release the tension in her by listening what she has to say. Wonderba!!
Husbands, some if not a lot of women are simply like that. My husband does not say anything when I do that. I am guilty of being one I guess but I told my children to be thankful to hear my annoying voice instead of me giving them the cold shoulder. When I am quiet, that shows I am really angry except the volcano eruption is inside me and not out.
The phrase like 'perempuan macam kerak nasi' (gosh! how's that in English). When you are close to burning your rice that you cook on the stove ( it does not happen if you use a rice cooker though), having taken all the rice at the top and if you pour water to the rice at the base, it will soften eventually. Sounds terrible but I hope the message came across.
A kiss and some nice words to your wife in the morning before you leave for work may guarantee you a cooked dinner in the evening. Ha ha :)... A short 'I love you' message at work works everytime, especially when you are in a meeting.You might end up smiling and your boss must be wondering why!!! When your wife is angry, grab her and hug her from behind and hold her tight, don't say anything. When she is calm, turn her around and simply hug her a little longer. It works most time. When your wife speaks, be silent. When she is silent, sit her down and speak all you want.Look her in the eye and hold her hands while talking.
Women with a good heart do not require expensive gifts as bribe but a nice house and a big car or a Galaxy Note will do (Ha...ha.. just kidding). I mean if you are thoughtful and you can afford it, gifts are most welcome. Otherwise the spiritual nourishment she gets from your love may sustain the marriage among others I am sure. Never compare your marriage to other couple's marriage. What is perfect for them may not be perfect for you and your spouse.Good Luck, make doa and get blessing from Allah.
After the tazkirah this morning, was news and the first news that came on was about a wife being killed by her husband after an uncontrolled argument and rage, heard by neighbours. Astghafirullahalazim... Syaitan must be celebrating.. Take care everyone, may all who reads my blog be blessed by Allah s.w.t. every moment of their lives, our lives. Amin.
During the days of Saidina Omar Al-Khatab r.a. (apologies if I do not write this well), a guy was on the way to see Saidina Omar when he heard Saidina Omar's wife babbling away (berleter in the Malay language, is there an English word describing that?)as he was approaching the house. He did not continue to walk to Saidina Omar's house but instead turn around and left but was quickly called back by Saidina Omar. He was asked why he turned back but he refused to explain why but on Saidina Omar's insistence he explained. He said that he had a problem and wanted to ask Saidina Omar's opinion on it but as he was approaching the house he heard Saidina Omar's wife babbling away over only God knows what thus making him turn to leave. So Saidina Omar ra. insisted what his problem was so he explained. He actually wanted to ask Saidina Omar what he should do because his wife loves to do the same ( babbling away or berleter).
Saidina Omar responded to let her be after all she is the one person who beareth our child, she takes care of our children, she takes care of the food that she served us ...... (Do look up the correct references ok). Just let her release the tension in her by listening what she has to say. Wonderba!!
Husbands, some if not a lot of women are simply like that. My husband does not say anything when I do that. I am guilty of being one I guess but I told my children to be thankful to hear my annoying voice instead of me giving them the cold shoulder. When I am quiet, that shows I am really angry except the volcano eruption is inside me and not out.
The phrase like 'perempuan macam kerak nasi' (gosh! how's that in English). When you are close to burning your rice that you cook on the stove ( it does not happen if you use a rice cooker though), having taken all the rice at the top and if you pour water to the rice at the base, it will soften eventually. Sounds terrible but I hope the message came across.
A kiss and some nice words to your wife in the morning before you leave for work may guarantee you a cooked dinner in the evening. Ha ha :)... A short 'I love you' message at work works everytime, especially when you are in a meeting.You might end up smiling and your boss must be wondering why!!! When your wife is angry, grab her and hug her from behind and hold her tight, don't say anything. When she is calm, turn her around and simply hug her a little longer. It works most time. When your wife speaks, be silent. When she is silent, sit her down and speak all you want.Look her in the eye and hold her hands while talking.
Women with a good heart do not require expensive gifts as bribe but a nice house and a big car or a Galaxy Note will do (Ha...ha.. just kidding). I mean if you are thoughtful and you can afford it, gifts are most welcome. Otherwise the spiritual nourishment she gets from your love may sustain the marriage among others I am sure. Never compare your marriage to other couple's marriage. What is perfect for them may not be perfect for you and your spouse.Good Luck, make doa and get blessing from Allah.
After the tazkirah this morning, was news and the first news that came on was about a wife being killed by her husband after an uncontrolled argument and rage, heard by neighbours. Astghafirullahalazim... Syaitan must be celebrating.. Take care everyone, may all who reads my blog be blessed by Allah s.w.t. every moment of their lives, our lives. Amin.
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